Friday, October 31, 2008

Save and Share!




In the P&G Saver insert, that is coming out November 2nd, are coupons that if redeemed by you help to feed hungry families in need this holiday season. You can go even further by donating a meal in your name through Cascade!

Reach out to those in need, and remember what Thanksgiving is truly about... Sharing what you have with those who are in need, and giving thanks to the One Who bestows blessings on you so that you can bless others in return.

Click here for more information :)

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Cry Out

Battle for The Sanctity of Marriage

This Saturday November 1st, in San Diego, California there will be a massive gathering of people who are crying out to God for His divine intervention against the legalization of homosexual marriage. On November 4th, Proposition 8, a state constitutional amendment will be voted on in the state of California. It was originally titled The Marriage Protection Act, but has since been changed to the Eliminates Rights of Same-Sex Couples to Marry. If passed, this will protect traditional marriage between one man and one woman in the state of California. If it doesn't pass, homosexual marriage will be legalized in California.

Why does what happens in California matter? If gay marriage is legalized in California, same-sex couples from all other parts of our nation will flock to be legally wed and then will carry that union back to their home state. If this amendment fails, those same couples will go back to their respective states and sue the state government demanding that same-sex marriage be declared legal. What affects one part of our country, affects the whole. In the ominous words of Gavin Newsom, the mayor of San Francisco, “As California goes, so goes the nation.”

What will happen if gay marriage is legalized? There have already been clashes between religious liberties and gay marriage. Just last week first graders in San Francisco witnessed the marriage of their lesbian teacher and school officials called it "a teachable moment." These godless ideals will continue to infiltrate every part of our society, unless we take a stand for the truth.

God ordained marriage, not man. And He ordained it between one man and one woman.

Genesis 1:27
"So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them."

The Bible leaves no room for alternate interpretations of what God had in mind when He created marriage. It is only the foolish, arrogant presumption of man to think that we can redefine what has already been defined for thousands of years.

We are in a battle for the soul of our nation. This is just one battlefield of many. It is time for the Church to rise up. Who will speak for truth if we remain silent? Who will cry out against evil if we do not?

Our nation needs to return to the foundation of Biblical values that it was erected upon.

Cry out for the salvation of those who are lost. Cry out for the deliverance of those in bondage to sin. Pray for the truth to be revealed. Pray for love to be shown and demonstrated. We come not to condemn; but to show mercy, as we ourselves have been shown great mercy for our sins. We stand as beacons in darkness, shining forth the love and light of Jesus. Cry out for revival in the deadened hearts of our nation.

I will be praying on Saturday in support of the covenant of marriage between one man and one woman. We must turn back the tide of immorality that has gripped our nation and turn our hearts back to God. Cry out for mercy.

2 Chronicles 7:14
"If My people who are called by My name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin and heal their land."


To hear more information about this amendment and the event at Qualcomm Stadium in San Diego, you can listen to the radio broadcast on Focus on the Family.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Supermarket Steal!



After perusing the Albertsons sale flyer, I decided that I had to get in on the BOGO meat and poultry deal!

So here is the breakdown:

Boneless Skinless Chicken Breast 7.90 lbs for $15.80 (that's $2 per lb for boneless/ skinless!)
SAVED: $15.76

Angus Chuck Roast 6.50 lbs for $18.82
SAVED $18.53

Total meat and poultry would have been $68.91 without the BOGO.
With BOGO it was only $34.62
SAVED: $34.29
I saved 50% on the meat and chicken!

The rest isn't as thrilling as that deal was, but still some good sales...

Seattle International Sourdough Rolls 2/$5
Albertsons Brand Sour Cream $1
Albertsons Brand Whipping Cream $1
Kikkoman Teriyaki Sauce (the 20 oz size!) 2/ $6
La Victoria Salsa 2/$4
Land O'Frost Bistro Lunchmeat 2/$6 - MQ $1.5 (because store doubled the $1 coupon!) PLUS there was a MQ on the package for $0.45! = 2/$4.05
Fresh Express Salad 2/$5 plus MQ for free bananas up to 2 lbs!

Here is the coup de grace though...in the paper there was a Safeway coupon for $10 off any purchase of $50 or more. I brought that in hoping and praying they would honor it because it was a competitor's coupon...AND THEY DID!

So grand total for a the whole trip (drumroll please....................)

$51.15
Which is only $1.15 more than I budgeted for!

Without coupons or store sales I would have spent $111.97 for all that. So that is a savings of 46%! Not too bad considering I only had one MQ to wield!

God is soooo good to me! I prayed with Mr. Q before I went with Miss Precious in tow. Never fails, when I acknowledge Him first and ask for His favor, I get it!

Psalm 68:19
Blessed be the Lord,Who daily loads us with benefits,The God of our salvation! Selah

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

My List....

I just realized that I still haven't cast my ballot yet...

I haven't tallied up my expenses for the months of August, September and almost October...

I haven't balanced my checkbook yet, even though the statement came last week...

I have a load of laundry that has been sitting in the dryer for two days now...

What's even worse is I have a load of laundry that has been sitting in the washer for that long too...yep, I will be redoing that load for sure!

What is on your to-do list that hasn't been done?

And lest anyone think I am a regular procrastinator (I am a recovering one), my daughter has been sick for the last three or four days. I can't remember exactly how long because day and night meld into one exhausting glob....

Monday, October 27, 2008

Dancing With My Daughter




Today she took her first steps...

When I told my mom, she said "She the last one you have to teach how to walk." No more little toddling toes hesitantly following my steps. This is the last time that she reached for me and couldn't quite make it. Three steps. The beginning of many she will make in her life. There is a part of me that rejoices in her progress and another part of my heart that wants to freeze this moment so that she never grows up.

Ah, but that is not the reason I have children. We raise our children so that they grow up mature, ready for what God has for them to do. This readiness is spelled out in the pedestrian activities of obedience each day. Nothing exceptional, yet so intentional. We are here to prepare them for His service. We are here to equip them to share His love with an love-starved world. We are here to help them become adults whose lives are dedicated to the Lord.

So I watch as she hesitates but then courageously steps forward again. She knows I will be there to catch her if she should fall. And I will be there to encourage her when she doesn't quite make it.

So as she takes these first steps, I find myself stepping back out of the way. And thus begins the beautiful dance of growing up. Filled with joy and expectation, I move in cadence with her.

Proper English

Sunday, October 26, 2008

He Said Yes!

Yipee! My hubby agreed to be Lucy and Desi! This is going to be so fun :) We'll be sure to take lots of pictures!

Going to bed now because my daughter has been sick and kept me up all night long....

Saturday, October 25, 2008

The Understudy...

Jenni asked me what I would wear to become Lucille Ball. After looking at several of her photos, I came up with this...

*She almost always wore pearls
*She almost always wore a dress or skirt, very rarely would you see her in pants...never jeans.
*She wore her hair up in curls (this will be the challenging part for little ol' straight as a stick hair me)
*She wore fake eyelashes...either that or she had eyelashes to envy!
*She always wore red, RED lipstick

So, in an effort to maintain frugality, my pearls will be coming from Dollar Tree, I will just be wearing a skirt with a black top and over that my cute apron. I am going to make an "I Love Lucy" heart to pin to my apron. Hopefully I can find some fake eyelashes for cheap, and red lipstick too!

This is all contingent on the fact that my husband agrees to this whole crazy idea! He has been working overtime and I haven't had a chance to tell him my idea yet.

But I have fallen in love with the idea of becoming the dynamic duo for a night...we might even win the costume contest...who knows!

The only problem I have with my costume is she has blue eyes and I have brown. Mr. Q's costume will fit him perfectly...he just needs to perfect a little Cuban accent to his english..."Lu-ceee you got som' 'splainin' to do!" Oh, the other thing that he wouldn't be able to do is Desi's slicked back hair...my husband can't stand his hair longer than two inches...lol. He used to have the poufy slicked back hair when I first met him, I have pictures to prove it...problem is I don't have a scanner that works :( So maybe I should find him a Cuban-looking hat? Or we can pretend Desi got drafted?

Trying to Find Myself...

No, I haven't lost myself...not yet anyway! Trying to find a very frugal, yet fun, costume for Mr. Q and me. The challenge is on! Our church is doing Hallelujah Night for the kids on the 31st and the theme is any period of time.

Originally I was thinking Ancient Egypt, because what girl doesn't secretly want to dress like an Egyptian queen? Plus my sheer curtains, that no longer hang over my patio door (they get replaced in wintertime by thermal lined curtains), would have made a great costume. But Mr. Q wasn't up for being Pharaoh. What guy doesn't want to rule the known world?

So Egypt went the way of the pyramids...

Then I was looking up famous couples in time...ran across these two faces...



What do you think? I have reddish hairdye and a handsome Hispanic hubby...do you think we could pull off the famous duo? I have to wait and see what Mr. Q thinks, but "I Love Lucy" was one of his favorite TV shows too.

Now what to do for the kids....

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

In Which You Will Find Me Dancing In My Kitchen...

The Apron Queen has a fun giveaway on her blog, go check it out! Don't forget to carefully study her step-by-step instructions regarding the Secret Ingredient.

Oh, and if I win the $30 giftcard, you WILL find me dancing in my kitchen...

Mrs. Q's Confessions...

It is said that confession is good for the soul. I do agree with that, but it also makes for great blog material...lol!

I am not a coupon queen, just someone who enjoys saving money! I aspire to the greatness of Ellie Kay, but it will take me YEARS to get that good! (If you haven't read her book, run, don't walk, to your local library and borrow it!)

I do not know everything there is to know about being frugal. On my blog, I only post what works for us. The same might not be compatible with your family. You be the judge :)

When I created my grocery goal, we were not receiving any government aid. Now we are on the WIC program. I have chosen to keep the goal the same as a personal challenge. When I am able to achieve that, I will lower the amount to see how low we are able to go! Without the assistance, we would not be eating cheese, drinking milk or scrambling up eggs. I am so grateful for WIC! This assistance alone has saved us at least $45 this month. If you are low income, have any children under the age of five (or any on the way!) check out the link! You may qualify and it is such a blessing!

I am not a gourmet cook. Any recipes you find on my blog will be simple, no-nonsense meals. Please do not search for "cremebroche" or "tumeric"...you will not find either of those here. We at the FITPH have a simple palate. No elaborate hoops to jump through.

If a recipe has more than five steps to it, my eyes glaze over and I lose all concentration. If it has more than seven ingredients, forget it! It has to be a real taste-bud pleaser for me to go to any lengths of energy expenditure!

I am a good, albeit pedestrian cook. We are accustomed to a Mexican fare over here with the occasional meat and potatoes American meal thrown in. I use my pico de gallo seasoning more than salt. Garlic is used liberally in almost everything.

Onions make me gag. The challenging part is that Mr. Q loves onions in anything and everything. And I love the flavor they give to the food. What is a alliumiphobe (no that is not a real word..)to do? Mince! If I can't see them, they don't bug me!

I like to make up words. My family tells me that I should write them down and create a dictionary. Sample: integritous-full of integrity...doesn't it make sense? It is less laborious to say "He is so integritous." rather than "He is full of integrity." Maybe some day I will make my own dictionary.

Typing a post while holding a fussy baby takes a bit longer than I expected!

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Tag, I'm It!

Sarah tagged me, and while I normally don't participate in tag memes, this one sounded easy :)

I am supposed to list six things I value and six things I do not value.
So, in no particular order they are...

Things I Value:

Integrity, both in myself and others.

My awesome church, I am accepted and loved.

Friendships that spur me on in my walk with Christ.

The faithfulness of my husband, and his drive to provide for us and love us.

My handsome sons and adorable daughter, who are much more than I could have ever dreamed of.

Oh, and of course, the most important of them all: Jesus! Who died on the cross for my sins, was resurrected and is alive in me today!

Things I Do Not Value:

Doing laundry. OK, I am being brutally honest here, I loathe laundry. However, until I can hire a maid to do it for me (HAHAHA) I am stuck as the designated laundry lady. Plus, there are certain people in this household who simply MUST have clean socks and underwear!

Entertainment technology. We still live in the Dark Ages over here. No iPhones, actually, no cell phones period! No Wii. No Playstation. No cable. We chose to remain unplugged from all of that. We only watch DVD's that we borrow from the library (this speaks to our frugality not our convictions about television). Our kids only watch VeggieTales and similarly approved videos. We find that the less TV we and our children watch, the more content we are with what we have.

Dishonesty. No need for further elaboration here.

Popularity contests. I place no value on how much you make, what clothes you wear, what car you drive or where you live. That is not who you are. Simply the outside trappings...er..wrappings. As someone who was judged only on my outside appearance when I was younger (weren't we all geeky when we were younger?) I understand what it feels like to be deemed "un-cool".

Bugs in my house. This includes but is not limited to: fruitflies, ants, spiders, silverfish, beetles, flies, wasps, or any other creepy things!

Watches. I do not own a watch and probably never will. I can't stand to have something on my wrist. Which also means that I don't wear bracelets either! Not owning a watch does mean that I have to rely on the kindness of strangers to tell me the time when I am out and about. Because I don't own a cell phone either...lol.

Eenie meenie miney moe...I tag Jennifer at Peaceful Living who happens to be my dear friend. We'll have to give her a little bit of a longer time frame because she is planning a friend's wedding and she is down to the deadline.

Thanks for stopping by, and thank you Sarah for the tag! I had fun :)

Monday, October 20, 2008

Aztecan Delight

What do you do if your kids don't like rice, corn, beans or tomatoes?

Make Aztecan Delight! (I chose the name because my husband's heritage is Aztecan Indian, but you could name it anything you want!)

All you need are:

1 can of black beans
1 can of corn
1 can of diced tomatoes
Cooked rice
Little bit of beef broth for flavor

Mix up all of the ingredients in a medium saucepan until heated through and incorporated well. Roll it up in a tortilla and call it Aztecan Delight. The pickiest eaters might balk at it's innards so don't let them unroll it!

As an a nutritional side, this meal has complete protein from the beans, corn and rice. No meat needed :) You could add cheese though.

Sometimes just giving a plain old meal a fun, imaginative name makes them a little hungrier...

For more great frugal food ideas, check out Gayle's blog!

Under Construction-- Again...

This week I am reconstructing our Potter's Hand Elementary schedule, curriculum, activities, etc. Basically, what we had been doing wasn't working very well. Too long of days, not enough fun stuff and a mother-teacher who has no idea how much learning her kids can handle!

I expect too much of myself and of my boys. I forget that they aren't little adults, they are little kids. My dear friend, who runs a FABULOUS preschool ministry from her home, took valuable time out of her day on Saturday to give me some pointers on how to organize the time, subjects and crafts. She has a wealth of information stored in her head and she poured some of that into me :)

(As an aside note, if I didn't feel called to be homeschooling my kids I would be sending them to Peaceful Beginnings Preschool! She does amazing stuff with her students!)

Because of her encouragement, I rediscovered my passion for homeschooling. So this week, I will be asking God what He wants my boys to learn. And I will be listening very closely! :)

Proverbs 3:5-6
"Trust in the LORD with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths."


Psalm 90:17
"And let the beauty of the LORD our God be upon us,And establish the work of our hands for us; Yes, establish the work of our hands."

Friday, October 17, 2008

Will It End With You?

Normally, I do not care to involve myself in politics. With this presidential election, it is different. I was listening to Focus on the Family this morning and there was a registered nurse speaking out against abortion.

The Born Alive Infant Protection Act was passed to prevent hospital staff and doctors from leaving a viable baby, accidentally born alive after an abortion, to die of suffocation and starvation. It's basic provision was for those babies to receive immediate emergency life-saving care if they survived the abortion procedure.

One baby did survive and she speaks out against abortion today.

She survived a saline abortion. Let that sink in for a moment. A tiny, helpless two pound baby survived being burned internally and externally in uetero for eighteen hours. Does the horror of that grip you as it does me? Did you even know that babies could be born ALIVE after an abortion? Until today, I had no idea.

One nurse discovered this at the hospital that she had been working at for over a year. This ugly, inhuman side of medical practice was revealed one night after a Downs syndrome baby was aborted, lived through the procedure and was being taken to the soiled linens room to die alone. Jill Stanek was changed for life when she encountered infanticide in her place of employment. It was the unspoken horror that went on in a place that was supposed to provide care and healing to people. Babies are people too are they not?

The whole focus of our presidential race has been on economics. The abortion question has been raised but very infrequently. I personally don't care what the economic plan is that either candidate has. To me, the value placed on the lives of innocent babies far surpasses the value we place on our national debt.

A friend emailed me this:



Please vote for those who have no voice...

To verify these claims, go to BornAliveTruth.org or Jill Stanek's blog, of particular interest is the transcript of Sen. Obama's opposition regarding the Born Alive Infant Protection Act read it on pages 84-90.

ON A PERSONAL NOTE:

I have always held very fiercely to the belief that babies are people from the moment of conception. I have always considered abortion to be murder. Even when I was faced with an unplanned pregnancy, and the doctor told me I had "options", I declared to him that the only option was that I was keeping this baby. Just because I had chosen to have sex and that physical union resulted in a baby, does not mean that it is my choice to rid myself of the "inconvenience" of becoming a parent. I am so glad that I chose life because I never would have met Mr. Dramatic had I chosen to exercise my "right" as a woman to choose.

For those women out there who made the choice to abort their babies, I do not condemn you. My sin was no less than yours'. To God all sin is equal. It is only as humans that we try to make ourselves sound more righteous than someone else. To God all sin is equal, but His forgiveness and atonement for that sin is all encompassing. I invite you to find grace and forgiveness in Jesus. I urge you to find true, whole, holy love in my Savior, Jesus Christ. He is the only One who can wash away the crimson stain of sin that marks us all. He is the only One who can love you completely and perfectly. It is only in Him that I am able to be cleansed and whole.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Show Me The Meat!

Just took all three of the kids, plus Grandma (thank God!) and went to Safeway. There was an unadvertised meat sale going on! So here is what we got:

Beef Bottom Round Roast 2.56 lbs NORMALLY $11.49 ($4.49/ lb) ON SALE FOR $1.99/lb which means I got it for $5.09!

And I got another roast that would have been $12.53 but I got it for $5.55!

Hillshire Farms Smoked Sausage was BOGO and I had a $1 manufacturer's coupon! Two for $2.99 (less than the price of one: $3.99)

All total, I spent $14.63 on loads of meat...I love Safeway!

I saved 51% off of the total bill by shopping the sales and using my manufacturer's coupons.

I LOVE SAVING MONEY!!!!

And tonight, I put one of those slabs of premium beef (Rancher's Reserve) in my crockpot and let it cook. Tender, melt-in-your-mouth roast...effortless! Throw a package of onion soup mix (mine was generic) and a side of mashed potatoes...yummm!

Ravings of An Insomniac...

How can I be wide awake at 1:37 am?

Why did I just wake up in the middle of the MORNING (it isn't nighttime any longer...)????

As if I didn't get enough of not sleeping well...

Sigh.

On a brighter note, I am excited and nervous about Biblestudy tonight. We are going to put feet to our faith and go outside of church to do our workbooks. We are believing for open doors and curiosity of those around us. This is supposed to bolster our courage for actual witnessing. I'm still scared. There I admitted it. I am scared I will come up with nothing when someone asks me for a reason for the Hope that is within me. I'm scared I'll say the wrong thing and offend someone and turn them away from Christ rather than leading them to Him. And yet, I know it has nothing to do with me, but everything to do with my obedience. It is not dependent on my words, but what He says through me. He will give me the right Holy-Spirit-inspired words to say. And I have had practice with my two boys! :) If I can tell a child about Jesus, surely I can tell a stranger!

The other thing that occupies my thoughts in the wee hours of the morning is school. I feel like a hypocrite. I say I am homeschooling the boys, but we haven't done any school for two weeks! That first week of no school, I had a very valid excuse: laryngitis all week long. This second week, what is my excuse? Fatigue. How do other moms do it all? I am barely staying afloat with my laundry! Sometimes, I feel like I just need a mommy vacation for a day or so. Do they have those? The worst part about not schooling right now is the questions, from my kids. "Mommy, are we going to do school today?" (picture this asked with sweet expectant faces...now you understand the guilt!) I feel so overwhelmed with all of my responsibilities right now. And I feel like there is so much change needed, but I am tired of having to improve upon myself. I am wearied with undergoing construction of my person. Do you ever get tired of fixing all of your shortcomings? Do you ever get overwhelmed with the amount of items that need changing that you see reflected in the mirror of your soul? Sigh.

And right now I am reminded of the words of a favorite song of mine (I cannot remember the title...lol...but it is still a favorite!):

Here I am once again,
I pour out my heart for I know that You hear every cry
You are listening
No matter what state my heart is in
You are faithful to answer
With words that are true and a hope that is real
As I feel Your touch
You bring a freedom to all that's within
In the safety of this place
I'm longing to pour out my heart
Say that I love You
Pour out my heart
Say that I need You
Pour out my heart
Say that You're faithful
Pour out my heart
And say that You're wonderful!

(sorry can't remember who wrote this, otherwise I would give credit!)

I love to sing it with arms open wide in surrendered abandon to the One Who knows me inside and out...

Psalm 62:8
"Trust in Him at all times, you people;Pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us. Selah"


The best part is that He is awake even at 2:01 am! :)

I know He knows what my children need in the form of education. I just need to ask. I need to take the time to ask. That's the problem, making the time to find out His heart on the matter. I guess that is in part where my frustration lies, I know that I am supposed to be homeschooling them. That is the reason we are making so many sacrifices as a family, so we can be the ones to educate our children. That is my main impetus for being a stay at home mom, so that I can be at home to educate my children. And I guess that is also the reason I feel so guilty too, my husband works hard at his job, am I working as equally as hard at mine?

**Side note here, how come the rest of this post is in italics??? I cannot get it to go back to regular font. Aggh!**

Anyway, do you, as busy mothers, ever feel like any of the above??

The other thing about home education that I am struggling with, is finding our rhythym and homeschooling niche. There are those that swear by the Classical education method, some rave about unschooling, other families love their curricula, then there are others that embrace the ideals of Charlotte Mason. How do you decide, without too much trial and error, what is the best "method" for you? The sheer volume of choices is overwhelming! We are somewhat constrained by our budget, so curriculum is out of the running. We love to read, but until they can read for themselves, it would be rather burdensome to make reading our number one vessel for education. (I must add a disclaimer here: I strongly believe that reading well-written literature can give you a far better education than most textbooks. I personally devour books by the month!) And still, my boys are too active to want to sit down to workbooks every day either. We believe, as a parents of our children, that education happens all around us every day. We just have to be alert to those teachable moments. And we have to be willing to grasp those snippets of time with enthusiasm.

Well, now I am getting sleepy, and since I have such a big day ahead of me...today, I had better take advantage of slumber while I can! :)

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

To Be Continued..

Sorry dear readers, I am just too tired to write about "Have a New Kid By Friday."

I will report that I have returned to my old, familiar parenting rut. No, I am not proud of it, but just thought I would be honest with you. Changing the way you've done something for six years is HARD work! But I am working on it.

For now, I am just trying to survive the sleep deprivation I have been suffering from. I have got to figure out a way to get Miss Precious in her own bed! (She isn't the main problem, my horrible mattress is...lol) But she is still very much attached to me and still nurses at night. Her frequency has lessened, but I doubt she could go all night without a comfort snack.

Oh, I know that exercise would help me with my energy levels too, but I loathe to exercise. I had a walking partner, but she and I are both wimps when it comes to our Pacific Northwest autumn weather! We don't particularly enjoy walking with all of our kids in the pouring down rain or bitter cold. So that has gone the way of our summer weather...lol.

Anyone have any ideas on how to re-motivate yourself for school when a whole week of laryngitis kept you from teaching? I think I am suffering from a lack of creativity, which translates into lack of motivation. I love my kids and I know I am suppose to be homeschooling them, I just have to find the right educational avenue that works for all of us... no small feat!

So, when I can put together a coherent sounding sentence, and when I have enough functioning brain cells to evaluate my parenting, I will resume our series. Again, I encourage you to get the book from your local library!

Monday, October 13, 2008

HANKBF..Part Two

Continuing my post from Friday...

On Monday, Dr. Leman has you consider these four things:

1) Observe what is going on in your house. What areas in your relationship with your child(ren) really bother you?

In my notebook, I wrote:
When they talk back, whine or complain.
Having to tell or explain what I want them to do MULTIPLE times.
Tattle-taling on each other.


2) Think about how you'd like things to change.
Well, this could take a while as I am VERY sleep-deprived! I would like for them to respect me enough to do it the first time with no backtalk. They need to respect each other enough to not try to get each other into trouble on purpose!
Respect is going to be a big issue in our home, I can already tell. For one, I didn't grow up in a house where there was mutual respect between my mother and my father. So, I often don't know what respect looks like, which makes it hard to model! I am working on this one though
.

3) Decide to take the bull by the horns.
You have to make the decision that enough is enough! Changing what you have always done is a LOT harder than it looks. This morning I have caught myself repeating my instructions on more than one occasion! But change is not impossible, just challenging! :)

4) Expect great things to happen.
I think that this will be the hardest one of all, because I have been known to expect the worst to happen. Creating a positive mindset has always been a struggle for me.

So what changes do I have to make?
I have to learn how to parent with respect, both for myself and my children. This means no repeating instructions, no yelling to get their attention, no threatening with discipline,; just consistent, calmly stated, reasonable requests.
I have to foster a positive attitude about this whole change. Phil 4:8!


Notes from the chapter:

Say it once, turn your back and don't look back!

If they don't obey, pay their sibling to do it. Up until this point, we have not had an allowance for our children. We just expected them to pick up and help out around the house because they live here too. However, they won't learn anything about money handling and wise stewardship if we don't give them the chance.

What does my attitude say? Behavior is learned and my children are modeling the behavior they have seen. Yikes! Sometimes as a parent we think that our children just seemingly pick up bad habits from thin air. Whereas, in reality, most likely they are picking them up from US!

Do I expect my kids to misbehave? When we go somewhere do I run down the list of "you can'ts and don't you dares"? This one is a lot harder to NOT do than it looks!

What is the reason my child is doing what they are doing?

How do I feel in this situation?

Is this situation between my child and me a mountain or a molehill? In other words, is it of moral, ethical or eternal value? More often than not, you find yourself saying "no" to all of the above.

Character is caught from those you grow up with. GULP! Parenting is scary when you put it in terms like that! But THANK YOU LORD, we have Someone Who can help us develop better character!

Let reality be the teacher.

Learn to respond rather than react. Response comes from love, reacting is flesh-based.

B doesn't happen until A is completed. The simplest yet most challenging formula for parenting success...

So there you have my notes and thoughts about chapter one. Come on back tomorrow for chapter two!

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Have A New Kid By Friday!


(And you thought she always smiled!)

Tired of the tantrums, worn out from the battle of wills?

You too can have a new kid by Friday! No, we are not selling our children, although there are days I am tempted to put out a sign in the front lawn...

Seriously though, I am reading "Have A New Kid By Friday" by Dr. Kevin Leman. His straightforward, no-nonsense, humorous approach really appeals to me.

I will share a little bit of what I have learned so far without spoiling the whole Monday through Friday challenge.

How to Respect Your Children:

* Never do for them what they can and should do for themselves.
(So this means, let them make their own PB&J, clean up their own room and sort their own laundry! Now, this may mean that I will have to bite my tongue when it isn't done perfectly , but I need to realize that they are learning to be independent..of course, if I like the idea of them living at home for the rest of their life I could leave things as is and take the easy way out and do it all myself!)

*Don't repeat your instructions.
(Dr. Leman maintains that this says "You are too stupid to figure it out the first time I said it." to your child. I'll be wasting a lot less breath in the coming week!)

*Expect the best of them.
(He gave an example of taking the kids to the grocery store. What is the first thing you do? Tell them "Be quiet, sit down and don't grab anything off the shelves.", right? So we are EXPECTING them to misbehave, and children will always live up to your expectations.)

*Don't praise them.
(WHAT?!?!?! I'll have to admit that was my first reaction. But he goes on to explain that praise links a child's self-worth to what he does. So when I praise my child, they get the message that "I'm only worth something if I can do this or that well." That was the message that was conveyed loud and clear by my dad when I was growing up. Small wonder why that is something I struggle with today!)

*Encourage them.
(Dr. Leman states that encouragement emphasizes the act and not the person. So when we tell them they did a good job on cleaning the room and that they should be proud to be so responsible, we are placing emphasis on the behavior rather than reinforcing that your value is wrapped up in what you do.)

The main thing that I have absorbed as I have read this book, is that if I want to see change in my children, I must effect change in myself first! Oh, there is going to be a lot of change going on in the FITPH household in the coming weeks!

On Monday I am going to outline what he says to do that first day. Then I let you in on my private thoughts as I read that chapter. Come on back, it will be good!

Oh, and borrow this book from the library...you won't be sorry!

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

New Birth!

Tonight Mr. Dramatic made the momentous and life-changing decision to ask Jesus into his heart! It came with little fanfare, just taking advantage of the opportunity that God placed within my reach. I made sure that he was serious about it and understood what he was doing. When I quizzed him, "What is sin?" He answered "Disobeyin'."

Yep, he gets it :) It is nice to know that all the times I have said that to them really sank into their hearts.

I cannot remember if I noted it on my blog that Mr. Independent accepted Jesus on September 22nd of this year. Again, just grasping the moment when it was presented. And I made certain that he understood what he was doing too.

My goal this year was to see both of my sons get saved. I have been praying and believing for them to come to the knowledge of their need for a Savior. Now I can just build upon their salvation and bring them to know this God Who loves them infinitely.

God is faithful to finish the work that He has begun!


3 John 1:4
"I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth."

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

How I Do It...

After my post yesterday, Gerberdaisie left me a couple of questions to answer:

That's great that you've reduced your grocery bill! We've reduced ours a bunch, mainly out of necessity with life changes :) Did you use coupons at all, or were you just more conscious with purchases?

And because I tend to ramble when I write, I thought it would be better to address the questions here rather than in a very long comment...lol!

First of all, at the beginning of this year we were spending roughly $700 on groceries for a family of five. Our daughter was born August of 2007, and I quit working my part-time job to be at home with our kids. That cut our income by $600 a month. I started looking for ways to economize and the only category that wasn't a fixed expense was groceries. So I basically made it my part-time job to see how much I could reduce our expenditures at the store.

I began by just being more conscious of what I was purchasing and how much we really needed it. After a month or two, I realized that we were buying a lot of pre-packaged, more expensive items. We decided to do away with foodstuffs that fit that category. Yes, we said goodbye to Minute Rice, chicken nuggets, pre-made juices, etc. And instead, we stocked up on rice in bulk, whole chickens (when on sale), and juices from concentrate. It was a small step in the right direction.

In May of this year, I discovered coupons. I read a couple of books on the subject, but my favorite by far was "Shop, Save and Share" by Ellie Kay. Check it out at your local library and take notes! She goes over basic couponing and more advanced transactions. Plus, she encourages you to give of your excess freebies. Giving to others is important even when you feel like you can't squeak it out of your tight budget. God blesses us because we are generous :)

So when I started couponing, our grocery bill went from $700 a month to $600 a month! That was just in the first month. Talk about motivating results! I just dutifully followed what Ellie wrote in her book and it works! When I first began couponing, I was skeptical that I wouldn't just be wasting my time. Because it is time and energy spent (not to mention braincells!) to line up good deals and do price comparisons. But after tallying up the receipts for the month, I was a believer! In just using coupons and shopping the store sales, I saved $342.85 (off of the regular prices) for the month!

Last month and this month, our budget was so tight that we couldn't justify spending the extra $3 on two papers. So we have gone without coupons for about two months now. I utilized the FoodDay coupons that come free every week. And I let those flyers guide me to great sales on meat and poultry.

But it wasn't until recently, when we really tightened up the budget, that I realized we could lower the grocery budget even more. It's amazing what necessity can motivate you to do...lol!

I realized having a meal plan and working that plan would save me money too. That part of it, I am still working the bugs out of! Maybe in a couple of months I will be able to declare victory in that area too.

Our meals are not gourmet. We do a lot of meatless meals too. And, like this particular paycheck cycle, wherein I only have $15 to last me two weeks, you get really creative with your meals!

It is really the grace of God that it all works so well. I give Him all the credit, because in reality it shouldn't work. The numbers don't add up. But we are faithful tithers and givers, and He blesses our obedience! He is our Source, and we are dependent on Him for our provision.

Recently, a friend who gets the paper every week, brought me all of her unused coupons. So now, I am going to get back into couponing! I will use the coupons to buy stuff we couldn't normally afford.

My advice Gerberdaisie, is this:

1) Pray for wisdom and good deals before you go shopping.
2) Shop with a list and take cash--you are more aware of the amount you are spending if you are having to count it out to the clerk!
3) Stick to the list--make sure that the items on your list are the absolute necessiites.
4) Don't go shopping with small children in tow--I love my kids, but they distract me from adding up savings and totals. On the few occasions where I have taken them, I have almost always wound up at home realizing I was overcharged for something.
5) Shop at your peak time. What I mean is, go shopping when you are the most alert, which may not necessarily coincide with the less busy hours of the store. :(
6) Have your coupons well organized! You don't have to buy any expensive holders, make do with what you have! I used a Rubbermaid container and put a piece of cardboard in the middle of it to act as a divider. On one side I have envelopes with little letter tags on them: A-Z. The other side is where I keep my calculator and pens. What works for me is filing coupons according to the brand name. Lysol would go in the 'L' envelope. Some people swear by filing according to categories. I don't have enough functioning braincells to remember if I filed the Comet Cleaner under 'C' for cleaners or 'B' for bathroom! Make it easy on yourself :)
7) Watch the individual totals as they are being rung up. Make sure that you are getting those store deals! This is why you don't go shopping with kids. It is physically impossible to keep your eyes on two different things: the cash register totals or your children who are in the process of rearranging the candy!
8) If you find an error, be polite and kind. People are more willing to help you out if you are nice :)
9) Use manufacturers coupons and store coupons together to get the best deals. This is perfectly legal and you can really score at the register with this tactic.
10) Don't forget to price shop according to quantity as well. Sometimes the advertised deals aren't the best.
11) Take advantage of the loss leaders, but don't let the store take advantage of you! Stick to your list!
12) Shop at several different stores. Yes, it is a pain, but this is how I started to realize most of my savings!
13) Keep your mission uppermost in your mind. What is that drives you other than the money? For me, the reason I do all this work is so that I can stay at home and raise our children. This is my mission. What is yours?

I hope that helps you a little!

You can take a look at these for some more ideas:
How addictive couponing is

No more drive-thru denial


How my friend does it!

Here are some great sites that I frequent as well:

Money Saving Mom

Grocery Cart Challenge

Monday, October 6, 2008

Food For Thought

Owlhaven posed and interesting question on her blog today:

I have a question for all of you who are currently displeased with your current food costs. When you think of your own food spending (groceries and restaurant spending combined) what do you think is the biggest reason you struggle to keep your food budget down? Is it rising food costs? Picky kids? No time to cook? Nothing in the cupboards? An unhealthy obsession for Panda Express orange chicken? Name your nemesis.


(After an unusually long comment, I decided rather than taking up space on her blog, I would post the answers to her question and then link back to her.)

First of all, I too share the unnatural obsession with Panda Express Orange Chicken. In fact, as of right now, I am seriously craving it just because it was brought back to mind! The budget-dangerous fact is that I live within two miles of TWO Panda Expresses. However, I have decreased the severity of the withdrawals with homemade sweet & sour chicken and rice.

I would have to say that the biggest pitfall lies within myself. I am not a veggie fan and I like meat! See the problem? Here is a list of vegetables I will swallow:
Broccoli
Carrots
Corn
Potatoes (yes, I know they are a starch, but I consider them a vegetable)
Black Beans (again, the proper classification would be a legume)
Lettuce (no iceberg please!)
Pickled Beets (I know, for someone who doesn't like veggies I like weird ones)

Oh, and pasta gives me indigestion...lol! So there goes that budget conscious meal!

That's about it. So in order to eat less meals containing dollar devouring meat, I have to eat more of the above. Which doesn't provide much variety. This brings me to another point...

The spice of life, you guessed it, variety! It is hard to have interesting, palate-pleasing meals that don't repeat over and over again, when you have a limited food budget. Eating potatoes, again and again doesn't make for a joyous rush to the table! (That being said, I want it to be known that I am extremely grateful for the food we do have and anything is better than being hungry!)

The price of food has risen, however we have successfully lowered our food budget by 2/3---Thank the Lord for His provision! It's amazing how you can shut off the cravings and gimmees when you don't have the funds. It all begins with a mindset change. Do I really need this? Or is this just a desire?

I am a proud stay at home mom and my husband is an awesome provider. We don't go to restaurants, I pack his lunch every day (which I view as another way to say "I appreciate what you do and thank you"), and we appreciate the special treats all the more when they come our way. Ice cream takes on a whole new indulgence when you don't get it every week!

So to answer Owlhaven's question: The biggest thing to bust my budget is only a lack of creativity with what I have and a lack of gratitude for what we have been given. Contentment is cheaper and healthier :)

Happy Birthday Mr. Querido!



What can I say about the man I love? He is everything I never knew I wanted :) His heart follows closely after God and he walks in His steps. He is calm and methodical (the polar opposite of me... lol!). He is intelligent and very creative. He thinks outside of the box when I can only see the inside. He is a man of great integrity and strong character. He stands tall when others bow to peer pressure. He is confident of where he is going and what he is doing. He is the most awesome father to our three little ones. He is someone I would be proud to have my sons emulate. And I hope my daughter finds a man similar to him to marry. He is so patient and kind. He is a faithful provider for us. And he is the first example of godly manhood I had ever been exposed to. He is Christ-likeness exemplified. He is my companion for life and someone I enjoy sharing life with. I cannot imagine life without him. We have only been married six years, yet sometimes I feel as if it has been longer because we know each other so well. I could go on and on about him but I don't have that much blogging time..lol!

So Happy Birthday Querido...I love you!

Sunday, October 5, 2008

He Cares For You!

Photobucket

Sarah from Everyday Elegance has invited me to participate in her "My Favorite Things Monday" carnival. I am honored to be invited!

First of all, let me just say that I loved the Sound of Music when I was little. "The hills are alive..." Oh yes, I did watch long musicals when I was small...lol! (I'm going to have to borrow that from the library, my kids LOVE music!)

The prompt she gave us was something that has lifted us up when we were down. The most current thing I can think of is my new, frilly apron!

The main thing that I think of when I put it on, is that I have a Heavenly Father who knows my needs and my desires. And sometimes, just because He wants to, He chooses to fling a blessing my way. Just because I am special to Him.

I really needed to hear that from Him this past week. There have been behavior issues with one of our sons, a really squeaky budget, and exhaustion to weigh my spirit down. I won't pretend that when I tied those apron strings, all of those cares magically dissipated. No, they were still there. But the knowledge of how much He values me, far outweighs the weight of the burden I was carrying! I am still working on casting my cares on Him. However, I am being taught the second part of that verse thoroughly..."for He cares for you." (I Peter 5:7)

1 Peter 5:7 (Amplified Bible)

"Casting the whole of your care [all your anxieties, all your worries, all your concerns, once and for all] on Him, for He cares for you affectionately and cares about you watchfully."


Oh, and just a little reminder, YOU are one of His favorite things!

Being Molded...

This week we had a caution flag waved frantically in our face. Our six year old, Mr. Dramatic took some candy and batteries from a store while he, Daddy and brother were purchasing milk. Fortunately the shoplifting was discovered right outside the doors of the store and all items were returned, but it made us wonder why he would do that!

I talked with my sage mother, Mrs. Sparks, who proffered the suggestion that perhaps we were saying "no" to his requests too often and he felt that was the only solution to get something that he wanted.

Now, by no means does that excuse his behavior and actions, but I started to think about that and replayed all the times I had said no to a request in the past week. Let's just say I couldn't remember many times when I had said yes.

I talked with Mr. Querido about it and he agreed that we needed to say yes more. To find ways of blessing our children rather than withholding simple treats. No, they do not need a treat every time they go to a store. But a something special every now and then lets them know that we think they are special too!

If God, the perfect Father, chooses to bestow blessings on us, imperfect children that we are, shouldn't we follow the example?

Our discussion hit profound depths of all aspects of our relationship with each other as well as the kids. We discovered areas that we are lacking and places where improvement is needed. So that we didn't lose sight of the goals we had set and the standards that were raised, we wrote them down!

Here is what we came up with:

I will be a good example of order and organization to my children (this one is mine to work on!)

I purpose not to be a perfectionist toward their performance of a task, but rather I will focus on their progress and celebrate each step. (this one is Mr. Querido's)

I purpose to shape my children rather than shoving them into a perfect mold (this one is both of ours)

I purpose to value them highly as God's great reward to me, rather than viewing them as interruptions and inconveniences (ouch...this one is both ours as well)

I purpose to be an excellent, not perfect but striving toward perfection in Him, reflection of Christ's character toward my children (again, a joint effort)

I purpose to cultivate a heart of willing obedience rather than compliant behavior in my children (another one we are working on together)

I purpose not to be lazy in my parenting (yep, both of us working on this one)

I purpose to parent them with love and respect (teamwork again!)

We talked about a lot of things tonight. And the best part is we really communicated, rather than just heating up the air. We heard each other's heart in the matter and we also purposed some things to each other as well.

I wanted to put down some more thoughts about some of the goals we set, but it is late and we are up early for church tomorrow. So perhaps on Monday I will delve deeper into our parental commitment.

Saturday, October 4, 2008

Wrapped Up In Blessings...

Just last night I was perusing some blogs and I ran across the absolutely cutest aprons!

Pink and Polka Dot has the awesomest ideas and crafts, but her aprons really shine! I loved the flounce at the bottom and had never seen that done before.

Well, today when I got home from a friend's bridal shower, there was an exact duplicate just sitting on my chaise lounge! I did a doubletake. Where did it come from? My husband replied that our sweet neighbor across the street had been at a quilt fair and had seen it and bought it for me!



So my point to this post is that He is generous and He hears the smallest desires of your heart and bestows blessings on you!

Feeling so special and blessed today! :)

Psalm 68:19
"Blessed be the Lord,Who daily loads us with benefits,The God of our salvation!"

Friday, October 3, 2008

Diligence...

Proverbs 21:5
"The plans of the diligent lead surely to plenty, But those of everyone who is hasty, surely to poverty."


"Diligence is discipline, over time, with excellence."
Dave Ramsey


Do you have a plan?


We are currently working on Step #1...because when I had my wisdom teeth extracted, that wiped out our emergency fund. Current amount saved: $15. Only $985 to go!

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Calling All Font Freaks!

Check out a wordle!

Just put in any text and randomize.... I did all of Psalm 91...it looked so cool!

You can even print out your creation if you like (I'm all out of printer ink. Boo hoo.)