Loosing the Silver Cord

"Or ever the silver cord be loosed, or the golden bowl be broken, or the pitcher be broken at the fountain, or the wheel broken at the cistern.
Then shall the dust return to the earth as it was: and the spirit shall return unto God who gave it."

Ecclesiastes 12:6-7 KJV

A week ago, my grandfather passed on to be in the arms of Jesus. He lived a long and full life, it was his time to return to the One Who gave him that life.

He was an amazing man, full of vitality and creativity. I am sure that my mom got her share from him! I remember him as a soft-spoken, gentle person who loved to laugh. He always had a hug for me and my sister. And when my parents got divorced, he was a source of strength for both my mom and sister (I was married by then, so my hubby was able to be my source of strength and Grandpa knew that). When I miscarried, he prayed for comfort. When our daughter, Miss Precious, was born a year later, he rejoiced with us in God's faithfulness. Family was everything to him.

This Friday I go to attend his funeral.

He will be missed. But we rejoice in the fact that he is with the One Who loves him infinitely.

"But I do not want you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning those who have fallen asleep, lest you sorrow as others who have no hope. For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so God will bring with Him those who sleep in Jesus."

I Thessalonians 4:13-14

Empty

After sending the letter to my father, I find that I am VERY attached to my email in-box. I keep checking it every hour or so. And it stares back at me...empty. My spam box mocks me with its contents. For all intents and purposes, it stands empty as well.

My mailbox at the curb is empty as well.

Empty. It is the same feeling that is echoed by my heart.

I cannot help but wonder if he has received my letter but chose to crumple it up and throw it away. Much like he has done with our relationship.
Or did he read every word that poured from my heart? Could he have been waiting for this courier of redemption?

But all I hear right now is the silence and the hollow echo of my mailbox as I shut it.

And my heart stands empty, waiting for his response...

"You've Got Mail" ...I Hope

Well, after much deliberation on my part, and a LOT of prayer, I sent off my letter to my dad. In it I told him if he wanted to communicate, we could start via email.

I am pretty sure he would have received it by now. So every day, I check my email. Hoping that there is something from him. I even check my spam.

Still nothing.

A part of me must learn to accept the fact that he might not want a relationship with me. He might just want to keep living his life the way he has and forget the messy, complicated part of being a parent.

Or maybe he is just trying to find the right words to say...

Whatever the outcome, I know that God will sustain me and that even if my earthly father abandons me, my Heavenly Father never will.

This Wednesday, the 31st, is my dad's sixty-second birthday. I gave him the only gift I could. It didn't come with a bow or very prettily wrapped. In fact there were no strings attached.

Forgiveness. I gave my dad forgiveness.

Happy Birthday Dad.

Diamond studded tree branches bow gracefully
Sugar snow crunches beneath our feet
Serene silence blankets the city
As the delicate snowflakes dance to earth

Girly Grins and Giggles...

Her first Christmas, that she remembers :) Wouldn't this make the most adorable Christmas card photo?

I just cannot get enough of her grin!

Her first expression upon seeing snow...

Here she is posing coyly for the camera...she reminds me so much of my little sister!

She had discovered she could reach the chocolate shake remains that her brothers left on the table just within her reach...

There is something about her eyes that draws me in...I love her so...

When I first found out I was pregnant with our third and that she was to be a girl, I could not imagine what life would be like. Up until that point, my life had been all about little boys. But I am so thankful that God graced us with her! She brings spunk, spice and little bits of sugar into our life...calorie free too! :)

Can't Wait....

In the quiet hours before dawn broke crisply over my city, I was busy creating a present for my sister and her hubby.

I can't divulge many details, because she occasionally reads my blog.

I promise to post a picture when Christmas is over and she has received her gift.

But I really surprised myself...I have talents I didn't even know about!

Can't wait to share my first artistic masterpiece!

Christmas Joys